Fiddle music is fucking awesome, and this subject is unrelated to anything

[yuuago]

I am exhausted because I stayed up too late last night writing Iceland/Finland porn.

Good lord, what is my life.

... Well, anyway. Things are going fine, I think. I have a chance for a job that I'm going to see about on Wednesday, but it might not be quite what I'm looking for, so we'll just have to see. Received a package from amarie_val, which was awesome. Went downtown today because I just had to get out of the house. Other than that, nothing's been happening, not much.

I did get some writing done today while I was out. "Real" writing, not... on-the-fly PWP. Which was nice. It's always such a good feeling to go to the coffee shop and open up my notebook and scribble up a page or two. I worked on that Swe/Fin story I've had going for a while, and I've reached one particular scene that I've wanted to write ever since I started it, so I'm really, really happy about that. I really like the atmosphere of this one scene, and the character interaction in it - or I will, if it turns out the way that I want it to.

Recently, I was reflecting on the fact that I write a lot more than what it would look like. Only a fraction of what I turn out actually gets posted here. Some of it gets tossed up on the anonmeme, some of it gets locked away in my writing journal. Even more of it gets shoved into "unfinished" folders, or never leaves the notebook.

Man. I... hmm. I think I should try to get better at actually finishing things. And not worrying about it sucking. Because that might be part of the "problem" (not that it's actually a problem, but). I find myself thinking "This isn't as good as some of my other stuff, so I shouldn't put it in my journal because it won't live up to other people's expectations". But if people are expecting quality from me all the time, they're barking up the wrong tree, because far more often what I turn out is "QUALITY"... so to speak. And why should I care? Who am I trying to impress? Why am I trying to impress other people? Shouldn't I just put things in my journal because it's my journal and I put pretty much everything in here and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks?

I really, really do not know.

Comments

[kainoliero.livejournal.com]

Iceland/Finland relevant to my interests!

[yuuago]

Is that so. I thought you'd say so (as you've written them etc)

I'd link you, but -- it's so bad. Seriously. xD So I dunno'....

[kainoliero.livejournal.com]

Cannot be as bad as what I'll do to you if you won't link me! No fair dangling goodies in front of me if I can't have them! DX

[yuuago]

Ohshit Gahhh well, okay.
First things first, before I toss you the link: It was written on-the-fly, in commentboxes on the anonmeme. It has not been edited, has not had anything done to it. There are typos. It's pretty rough. ... and I didn't actually finish it, er. (Though I intend to clean it up and fix it properly eventually, maybe)

Secondly, I feel like I should give you some context. It started with a "Post a fanart of your favourite character acting OOC" thread, in which this was posted. After discussing with a friend what might cause Icy to act so... oddly toward Finland, we decided that it was a spell gone wrong, because that's easy. And then I ran with that idea.

... Sorry for the tl;dr, I just. Uh. 'm actually kind've embarrassed, ahaha. Errrr anyway here it is, and I've linked it so you don't have to kill me for not linking it, and Iiiiii am going to go hide sleep now. Yeah!

[noonish.livejournal.com]

FIDDLE MUSIC YOU SAY

[yuuago]

YES. FIDDLE MUSIC.

It's so sexy. Really.

Oh, Noon. Memories.


Though a part of me likes the Estonian version of this better...

[noonish.livejournal.com]

also where is this porn give it to me i will like
uh





i will send you a moving van full of my little ponies

[yuuago]

Also uh, Noon, it's horrible. Really, it is. The porn, that is. And I didn't even finish it.
But fine, I'll link it to you as well. At least when it comes to you, I have no shame. Here.

Oh shit I'm supposed to be in bed uhhhhh
/RUNS

[noonish.livejournal.com]

pfffffft yuu that was like
so adorable and self-aware
I LIKED IT!!
i like how you write stuff with a lot of character in the words heheh

[yuuago]

Ahhh, that so? I'm glad you liked it. 'cause I kind of want to clean it up and actually finish it (then again, we'll see how lazy I get).

What do you mean by "self-aware", though?

[noonish.livejournal.com]

oh like they kept making out and finland is like "man we sure are doing a lot of kissing" i laughed. it was like the awkwardness of finland and the situation was so self-aware, but in a good way.

[yuuago]

OH THAT. Okay now I see what you mean. xD Writing that kind of thing was fun - haven't done something like that (self-aware) in a while.

[const-victoria.livejournal.com]

You sure have self-control. :) If I have a particular scene in mind I usually have to just go and write it down. Otherwise chances are I'm never going to start the story in question at all.

Not worrying sounds like a good plan. It's rather hard to draw a line between things that really are rather pointless (even if they are fun to play with in your head) and fic material sometimes, but in the end it's no big deal if something of the first group gets posted and quite a loss if something of the second group doesn't.
Well, for readers at the very least).