JFC

[yuuago]

I thought the nights of "can't sleep because I'm too busy crying over memories of the fire" were over, buuuut I guess not. Fuck.

The subject came up at work today, and of course I couldn't avoid hearing about it. In detail. Lovely. And of course in local events, it's been present as well, because they're still working to get the most highly-damaged areas safe for occupation, and there have been some developments in that regard re: demolition and so on.

Aaand now thoughts and memories of that whole fiasco keep cycling around in my head like a terrible infomercial.

This is ridiculous. Yes, it was a horrible experience, and I would never wish it on anybody. But I had it pretty damn good. I wasn't one of those poor sods stuck in Fort McKay, I wasn't one of the people who didn't have anywhere to go after leaving the city, I didn't lose my home, I didn't lose my job. I'm okay. My family is okay. We're okay. I shouldn't be so upset. We're okay.

Then again, it was, uh. Well, it was horrible. And, I don't know, what's an acceptable level of upset before you're allowed to randomly cry about it, anyway? I guess I shouldn't be hard on myself.

Ugh, this shit sucks, but I guess there isn't much I can do about it. I should probably read some poetry and then try to rest my eyes, if not get some sleep.

Comments

[kiraly]

*hugs* I don't think there's some kind of requisite amount of upset you have to be to cry about something. Especially not an experience like that. Even if other people may have had it worse, that doesn't change that something bad happened to you. I guess what I'm saying is, cry if you need to. And if there's any way I can help at all, you know where to find me. *hugs again*

[(Anonymous)]

It was a really stressful thing, it's okay.
I know it sounds like a cliche, but with some upsetting things in my life, making art about them provided a lot of relief and helped me get over them. Journaling also helps, the kind that you don't show anyone and pour all the thoughts out of your head, regardless of how "not okay" they might be.
Sorry you're still having a rough time, mate. I'm here if you want to talk. *hugs*

LK

[yuuago]

Thank you. <3 Intellectually, I know that it's okay to be upset and stuff, but my brain doesn't always agree with logic. orz

(And once again I am awake at an unreasonable hour BUT it is because I left packing to the last minute... of course.)

[yuuago]

Thanks. <3
I figured I was over it, but then... whammo. Guess this'll happen every now and then. Oh, well.