JFC

I thought the nights of "can't sleep because I'm too busy crying over memories of the fire" were over, buuuut I guess not. Fuck.

The subject came up at work today, and of course I couldn't avoid hearing about it. In detail. Lovely. And of course in local events, it's been present as well, because they're still working to get the most highly-damaged areas safe for occupation, and there have been some developments in that regard re: demolition and so on.

Aaand now thoughts and memories of that whole fiasco keep cycling around in my head like a terrible infomercial.

This is ridiculous. Yes, it was a horrible experience, and I would never wish it on anybody. But I had it pretty damn good. I wasn't one of those poor sods stuck in Fort McKay, I wasn't one of the people who didn't have anywhere to go after leaving the city, I didn't lose my home, I didn't lose my job. I'm okay. My family is okay. We're okay. I shouldn't be so upset. We're okay.

Then again, it was, uh. Well, it was horrible. And, I don't know, what's an acceptable level of upset before you're allowed to randomly cry about it, anyway? I guess I shouldn't be hard on myself.

Ugh, this shit sucks, but I guess there isn't much I can do about it. I should probably read some poetry and then try to rest my eyes, if not get some sleep.